FOR YOUR AMUSEMENT!
True Definition (1 of them)
Sleep \Sleep\, n.
Pronunciation: 'slEp
Function: noun
A natural and healthy, but temporary and periodical, suspension of
the functions of the organs of sense, as well as of those of the voluntary
and rational soul; that state of the animal in which there is a lessened
acuteness of sensory perception, a confusion of ideas, and a loss of mental
control, followed by a more or less unconscious state.
Note: Sleep is attended by a relaxation of the muscles, and the
absence of voluntary activity for any
rational objects or purpose. The pulse is slower, the respiratory
movements fewer in number but more
profound, and there is less blood in the cerebral vessels. It is
susceptible of greater or less intensity or
completeness in its control of the powers.
ISP Definition
Sleep \Sleep\, n.
Pronunciation: E' ViL
Function: useless
A natural and healthy (nothing we do is healthy), but temporary and
periodical (more like not at all and...um.. never), suspension of the
functions of the organs of sense (okay, now this can be done at the
computer, so we might be able to count it- it is the period where the butt
goes numb and you lose feeling to your legs and your mind feels a bit like
jello in a blender, you can't see straight, your fingers stop working, you
hear things ringing around you, and you can taste - involuntarily of course-
everything you have eaten in the last 4 days in your mouth at once), as well
as of those of the voluntary and rational soul (yeah right.. rational..);
that state of the animal (animal....haha.. now that's funny) in which there
is a lessened acuteness of sensory perception (induced by staring at a
monitor so long you actually could believe you are floating out of your
chair from which your butt has permanently adhered to), a confusion of ideas
(always), and a loss of mental control (always again), followed by a more or
less unconscious state (14 beers later).
Note: Sleep is attended by a relaxation of the muscles (what
muscles?), and the absence of voluntary activity (this would be that 29
hours in a row sitting in one spot right?) for any rational objects or
purpose (there is NO rational object or purpose to what we do). The pulse is
slower (I can use the minute hands to check mine), the respiratory movements
fewer in number but more profound (I'm not sure I'm even breathing anymore-
profound enough?), and there is less blood in the cerebral vessels (huh?).
It is susceptible of greater or less intensity or completeness in its
control of the powers. (i have powers? maybe deleting someone's entire
website or randomly kicking off users for no reason... but other than
that....nah.)
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Robert H. Clugston [SMTP:robert@csnsys.com]
> Sent: Friday, February 05, 1999 5:38 PM
> To: emerald@iea-software.com
> Subject: RE: [Emerald] annual accounts -- autobill = 0 (2.5.236)
>
> Who in the ISP business gets to sleep?
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: emerald-request@iea-software.com
> [mailto:emerald-request@iea-software.com]On Behalf Of Ronnie D. Franklin
> Sent: Friday, February 05, 1999 3:25 PM
> To: emerald@iea-software.com
> Subject: RE: [Emerald] annual accounts -- autobill = 0 (2.5.236)
>
>
> Yes.... but then again I am not sure you ever sleep!!!
>
>
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